Fan Review: Fireworks, Fizzles and Fortune Telling.

The completely biased San Jose Earthquakes fan Nerdy Gales wonders why Big Vic's goal didn’t make him smile, whether it was a hangover that dampened players' and fans’ spirits in Portland, and forecasts the result of the Quakes upcoming road game in Dallas. 

Stanford Fireworks:

Tickets for the second California Clasico of the season at Stanford had sold out a week before the game, so I knew the atmosphere in the 50,000 seat stadium would be electric.  Even so, I wasn’t prepared for the volume of the swirling crowd noise propelled by the 1906 Ultras, and somehow I missed the news that there would be a fighter jet flyover during the national anthem – the two jets' arrival was perfectly timed, but I jumped a mile with the breathtaking roar of their engines.  The game got off to a good start for the San Jose with Lenhart’s goal and celebratory chin-ups on the goal bar seven minutes in – he’s such a refreshing personality (was it the gum from his open mouth on Wondo's nose in Joe Nuxoll's team photograph?).  I finally got to see one of Beckham’s trademark free kick shots in person, when he bent it like only he can for the equalizer, and I’ll admit to a begrudging respect for this Galaxative as the former captain of my native land’s national team.  The remainder of the first half saw some uncharacteristic defensive errors from the Earthquakes back  line – an own goal by Jason Hernandez, and another error quickly exploited by Landon Donovan for the Galaxy's third goal.  Fortunately, it only took another three minutes for Big Vic Bernardez to peg back one of LA's goals, his first in MLS – you would never know as his facial expression didn’t change one iota; any celebration was displayed by intensifying his game face from the 'grimace' to 'menace' setting.

With the score line at 3-2, the Quakes players looked pensive as they walked into the dressing room at half time, with the exception of Steven Lenhart, who was provoking chuckles from David Beckham.  Every player's demeanor was intense as the second half got underway, and increased visibly in the Quakes players when Cronin slid in an early second half equalizer - by now, fans were confident that the Goonie magic would surely result in a Quakes victory.  The stadium cheers grew ever stronger, victory songs were sung and the atmosphere ratcheted up one louder to eleven – if you weren’t standing by then, you were on the edge of your seat.  When Wondo flicked in the winning goal, we all jumped up higher than the T-38 flyover.  Wondo's eyes were bulging wide as he clenched his fists, pumped them in the air then turned to the Ultras and kissed the Quakes badge on his shirt.  As this season has gone, so went the game: the Earthquakes held on and Magic Wondo was Goonie of the week. After his post match TV interview, Wondo ran to the welcoming arms of the Ultras and was smothered with pats on the back, more fist pumps and screaming voices of congratulation.  Finally, to cap off the perfect evening with a bang, the pyrotechnics after the game matched the wonderful display of fireworks we’d seen on the field. 

Portland Fizzle:

Only three short days later, the Quakes’ Portland trip got off to a bad start when, for the second time this season, the team’s flight was canceled, disrupting a few dinner plans – after nine points in three games, I failed to register this as a bad omen.  My own exit from work on Independence Eve was later than expected and finally began when I settled back on the couch with a cold brew and hastily acquired take out just in time for the 7:30 kick off.  I gradually relaxed into a postprandial stupor, just as the Quakes fast start was fizzling out – after a good first ten minutes they quickly seemed to tire, perhaps hung-over after the excitement of the LA game.  After the enormity of the fireworks at Stanford, my small screen showed a game that was far from a damp squib, but failed to deliver the now traditional Goonie magic.  The Timber’s two goals earned Timber Joey log slices for Mwanga and Jewsbury who, I was surprised to learn, hadn’t scored all season – naturally, I would rather they’d have waited to start their coffee table collection.  Even though our ever-reliable Flash Gordon pegged one back, the score finished 2-1, and the road defeat snapped Quakes fan Stuart Berman’s winning streak of wins after road trips to Colorado and Salt Lake; in Portland he surreptitiously became a 'fan of mystery' and blended in with the Timbers Army.

Dallas Forecast:

My own plans for this Saturday will be to take in an afternoon San Francisco Stompers game at Kezar Stadium that will finish just in time to make it over to the pub for beer, pies and the Quakes road game at FC Dallas.  Once again it’s a short turnaround time for the Earthquakes squad that flies out Friday for their sixth game in eighteen days.  FC Dallas is coming off a 1-1 tie against Toronto FC, where they got off to a flying start with a fifth minute goal from Zach Loyd’s header, only to make several defensive blunders to allow Koeverman’s  equalizer later in the first half. 2010 MLS MVP David Ferreira is back in the mix for FC Dallas after making his first appearance since suffering a broken ankle back in April of 2011; reportedly he worked productively with Brek Shea when he came on as a sub last week.  Ferreira’s return to the lineup, of course, might prevent San Jose fans from seeing former Quake Scott Sealy (the one, the only).  Any disappointment among the 1906 Ultras will be ameliorated by the knowledge that the swap of Sealy for Quakes midfielder Marvin Chavez (who will be returning to FC Dallas for the first time) means the Earthquakes got the better half of that exchange, acquiring both speed and accuracy.  Hopefully, with kick off at 8PM local time, temperatures will have cooled from the hotter-than-a-Roman-candle 98 degrees predicted for Frisco, TX.  FC Dallas’s statistics (3-9-6) add up to a Quakes (11-4-3) victory, and with Ferreira still finding his feet, his return probably won’t be enough to revive their fortunes and break their twelve game winless streak.  While Tressor Moreno was set to return to Santiago Wanderers, the Quakes have Jon Busch back in goal and the indomitable Magic Wondo named player of the month for June with his three game winners, including the all-important AT&T Goal of the Week against LA.  If the team keeps its cool, the Earthquakes should rebound from the Portland fizzle to Texas fizz and win this game before returning home next Saturday, July 14th for a few refreshing root beer floats.

Fireworks Photo Credit: Joe Nuxoll at CenterLineSoccer.com

Stadium Photo Credit: Lyndsay Radnedge at CenterLineSoccer.com

Kezar Stadium: A new Stomping ground in the Bay Area.

Nerdy Gales discovers semi professional soccer in the San Francisco Bay Area, and one team that has finally found a home at San Francisco’s historic Kezar Stadium.

I’m feeling restless.  It’s an awfully long time since I sat down and watched a San Jose Earthquakes game at Buck Shaw stadium – the May game against the Columbus Crew when Alan Gordon scored another late game equalizer.  Since then, we’ve had a couple of US Open Cup ties at Stanford’s petite Cagan Field to tide fans over until the LA Galaxy and fireworks spectacular across the campus parking lot on June 30th.

The next ‘home’ Earthquakes game is  the June 26th tie against the Seattle Sounders on June 26th.  The venue will be historic Kezar Stadium, the original home of  the 49ers – though for me, as a British teenager, it was my introduction to a far away city called San Francisco when I watched Dirty Harry wield the most powerful handgun in the world against the Scorpio killer in the middle of the pitch.  Reconstructed in 1989, Kezar now has a 10,000 seating capacity and has been home to the city’s cricket, lacrosse and Gaelic football.

Even with the Quakes’ success in the USOC, there’s a three week drought without a full or reserve squad home games.  Fueled by an ‘I-miss-the-smell-of-footy-on-real-grass’ feeling, I was mulling over my options when I came across another reason to venture forth to Kezar for a soccer game, and it’s coming up this weekend.  Back in March,  just before the Quakes season started, I stumbled (quite literally) on the SF Stompers FC playing beach soccer during a bracing walk along Ocean Beach.  As I watched spectacular barefoot bicycle kicks generating arcs of sand, I wondered who these impressive players were – I discovered they are one of three Bay Area teams in the semi-professional  National Premier Soccer League (NPSL):  the SF Stompers FC, the Bay Area Ambassadors, and Real San Jose.

The newest team on the block, the Stompers are brand new to the league this season, and have been playing in claret and orange in their temporary home at Terra Nova High School in Pacifica.  It was always their intention to play in their home city, but circumstances worked against them finding an immediate home in San Francisco.  Already more than half way through their season, with one win, two ties and three losses, their first game at Kezar is scheduled for 3 PM on June 16th against Sacramento Gold – and after a couple of recent heavy defeats, the Stompers are undoubtedly hoping for better luck in their new home.  The only remaining opportunity to see them at Kezar this season will be on July 7 against Sonoma Sol.

Mike Gonos, veteran Ultra and die-hard San Jose Earthquakes fan, has already been watching the Stompers play this season – for him it’s about supporting local clubs at all levels of soccer:  “We are very lucky here: NPSL has three Bay Area clubs, and three more within a couple of hours’ drive.  It’s like living in a miniature version of London – we’ve got so many local rivalries, particularly the Ambassadors, over in Oakland”.   With the switch to Kezar Stadium in place, the SF Stompers FC will have finally moved into their new home.  That’s a feeling that resonates with me as one of the squatters in Buck Shaw – while we are grateful for the hospitality of our gracious hosts, we can’t wait to move into our own place.  As Mike points out: “Kezar has the history, it’s here in the city, and it’s a great location. Being able to hop on the N-Judah and be at the match in a few minutes makes it truly local football…and with Kezar, we have a real chance to forge ties with the local pubs”.

I’ll drink to that.  The mid-afternoon kick-off provides plenty of time for a leisurely lunchtime pint (or two) at The Kezar Pub while watching the final round of Euro 2012 Group A games on TV.  So, if you’re craving live soccer this weekend, consider a drive into Fog City, hop on a Muni bus or ride the N-Judah line to take in a game of this freshly minted soccer team at one of the most historic sporting sites in the Bay Area.

Photo credits: Lyndsay Radnedge of Center Line Soccer.

Match Update:  It was a picture perfect, fog-free afternoon in San Francisco for the ground-breaking game at San Francisco’s Kezar Stadium.  In a closely fought match the SF Stompers earned some redemption over current 2012 NPSL Northwest 1st place Sacramento Gold for a 9-0 defeat in Sacramento earlier in the season. Forward Liam Whelan scored a header early in the second half that proved to be the game winner off a set piece crossed in by Andres (Felipe) Cabrera, and goalkeeper BJ Forte kept the clean sheet, resulting in  a 1-0 victory for the SF Stompers FC .

Photos by Lyndsay Radnedge here.

San Jose Earthquakes 3-1 Real Salt Lake: The view from the bleachers.

There will come a time this season when the performance of the 2012 San Jose Earthquakes will falter, and the fans will begin to wonder if the team’s early season success will translate into a spot in the playoffs. For the time being, I choose to live in the moment, bask in the glow of the team’s 5-1-1 record and wear the satisfied smile of a fan whose team is atop the MLS Western Conference after toppling RSL last Saturday.

My evening kicked off in the Epicenter where I bumped (gently) into Shea Salinas, who was sporting “Please Do Not Touch” across his freshly mended left collar bone. He seemed in good spirits – but then he was clutching a huge bag of chocolate chip cookies. Ellis McLoughlin and Joey Gjertsen graciously ‘scarved’ the necks of five-year-bleacher-veteran season ticket holders, though with game time temperature approaching 80 degrees, said scarf spent most of the evening carefully folded beside my seat cushion. As I assembled in the stands with my fellow fans, we chuckled as we remembered the great deluge that accompanied last year’s home game against RSL – this was most definitely the opposite.

The first hot day of the year turned into a balmy evening, as the sun sank slowly behind the Ultras as the players prepared to kick off. Any advantage to the Quakes in the first half with their backs to the sun were counteracted by the equally dazzling fluorescent orange kit worn by the RSL goal keeper Nick Rimando – think Mango Tangelo tropical Skittles – an unusual tactical move I thought. The game unfolded with the Quakes confidently controlling the ball, pressing on goal only to be denied on several occasions by the excellent deflection skills of Rimando. The straight red card issued to Espindola in the 29th minute reinforced the optimism among the fans, and we were rewarded just before half time with a Khari Stevenson header: 1-0 Quakes.

The good cheer was subdued by a well-crafted goal by Kyle Beckerman, who effortlessly weaved his way through the Quakes defense, placing the ball in the net past Jon Busch in the 53rd minute. As the half progressed without any Quakes success on goal, more than one fan harkened back to the disappointment of last season’s scoreless home tie against a ten-man LA Galaxy with diminutive midfielder Mike Magee in goal. Compared to that game, maybe even because of it, we saw a much more positive coaching response: firstly, forward Steven Lenhart replaced midfielder Sam Cronin in the 61st minute; secondly, after Lenhart was pulled down by the ‘last man’ Jamison Olave, who earned his own red card in the 69th minute, defender Ike Opara was replaced with forward Alan Gordon. Obviously, the Quakes were aiming to capitalize on RSL’s unusual, and increasingly stretched 4-4-0 formation.

It’s not clear if Olave was ambling, moseying or sauntering as he left the field, but his tortuously slow exit contributed to the six minutes of stoppage time that turned out to be crucial in ensuring the Quakes eventual victory. After the final substitution for Baca with Garza in the 82nd minute, Dawkins and Wondo netted headers in the aforementioned stoppage time, with the final tally on the night 3-1 in favor of the Quakes, 100 appearances for Jason Hernandez and 100 MLS victories for Frank Yallop – congratulations both.

Saturday’s performance against erstwhile conference leaders Real Salt Lake was heartening on several levels. It was particularly encouraging to see proof of how deep this year’s roster really is – with the loss of four key players (Bernardez, Chavez, Corrales and Salinas) any other season the squad might have been considered shorthanded. This year, Hernandez, Moreno, Opara, and Dawkins stepped in seamlessly sustaining the possession football we had seen in the Vancouver and New York games; the Quakes played at least as equals to RSL, one of the better teams in the league over the past couple of years. Even though it took a while to nail down the victory, I was also encouraged to see that the goals were scored by three different players: Stephenson, Dawkins and Wondo.

My own ‘man of the match’ was Steven Beitashour, who put in another tireless and creative performance that earned him two assists on the night in addition to his solid defensive work at right back. Honorable mentions also go to Tressor Moreno, who was very calm, confident and poised on the ball, and Justin Morrow who made several incisive and productive runs deep down the left flank. Fans were excited to see the MLS debut of Sam Garza, and while he didn’t have much time to leave his mark on this game, he left RSL’s remaining defenders in his wake. I had seen Garza put in a tireless effort in the reserve league on Easter Sunday, where he earned an assist – with the effective play of defensive replacements Opara and Hernandez, I was once again reminded of the value of the reserve league, where all three had recently played together.

The final relief of the late game winners was still being articulated by the veteran season ticket holders as we lined up down the touchline waiting for our souvenir photograph in the North End goal. There are also many seasoned veterans among the fans, appreciative of the efforts of the front office to recognize our support over five years in the bleachers at Buck Shaw; our squad is just as deep.  There will surely be challenging times ahead this season, sometimes there will be failure and disappointment, but right now the Earthquakes squad is playing well and the roster looks deeper than ever before – deep enough to weather potential storms. With so many hands available to be called on deck, it’s full steam ahead.

Where Are They Now? The Vaguely Unsettling Giant Inflatable Jersey at Buck Shaw Stadium.

As the third home game of the season is on Saturday, April 21 (7:30PM) approaches, once again there will be a gaping hole at the southeast corner of the pitch at Buck Shaw stadium – and I don’t just mean the absence of Shea Salinas and Big Vic Bernardez.   I hadn’t realized how I had gradually become accustomed to the vaguely unsettling giant inflatable Earthquakes jersey that the fans passed on their way into the stadium through the George Best Gate.

The mighty inflatable cut an imposing figure, with bulging shoulders and a glistening 40 foot chest, emblazoned with the team’s former sponsor.  Why did I find it so unsettling?  Maybe I watch too much Mystery! on PBS, but in darker moments, it appeared to be an over-sized dismembered torso from Gulliver’s Travels.  I imagined other body parts distributed around various locales – people walking their dogs would uncover giant inflatable shorts in the Muir Woods, giant inflatable legs would be discovered in storage lockers still wearing their giant inflatable boots, and a giant inflatable head would wash up on the shores of China Beach. I also have an irrational fear of giant inflatable objects – as a kid I watched reruns of the oddball suspense series The Prisoner, with its menacing inflatable balls that suffocated escaping prisoners as they made a break for it across the windswept beach.  These huge balls were not to be trifled with – they were swift, relentless and could asphyxiate in seconds (much more punishing than a three match suspension).  For this reason I often found myself inspecting the restraints on the giant inflatable jersey before I could get settled in the bleachers.

So when the giant inflatable jersey left town when the Amway bubble burst, I found that I still had many unanswered questions:  How big was the shirt? What was the shirt made from?  How many pounds of pressure were needed to inflate its full and bulging biceps?  How long did the shirt take to inflate?  Where was it kept between games?  But above all – I want to know where it is now and if the club has any future plans for it?

Talking over beers with friends and fellow fans, we’ve had fun considering how the giant inflatable shirt might be re-purposed for the city of San Jose.  Most ideas focussed on the bouncy traits of inflatables – castles are standard issue at kids’ parties, and a soccer shirt would lend a certain challenge to little ones to stay on top, but would surely make most parents cringe in fear of hospital bills for broken limbs.  My engineering buddies pointed out the advantage of that much air in such a large volume, and which could be exploited for superlative sound insulation – perhaps  it could be installed between the new stadium and the railroad, so the 1906 Ultras’ gameday chants won’t be drowned out by the noise of the trains.  While the monster shirt might fit Big Vic off the peg, I wondered  if it could be tailored down for  the slighter 150 pound frame of Shea Salinas – a smaller, personalized version to wear in training would protect his fragile clavicle as he gingerly returns to the pitch – something along the lines of this Norwegian bubble soccer.

One intriguing possibility is the Swap of the Table jersey exchange run over at the Top of the Table web site.  The jersey swap is a social experiment among fans, copying the exchange of jerseys by players the end of games with the call for jerseys broadcast on Twitter over a two week transfer window - hopefully the fans’ jerseys are not as sweaty.   CLS’s resident kit nerd Robert Jonas recently traded an Earthquakes training top and a pair of FC Dallas shorts for a Philadelphia Union home jersey and a personalized Peter Crouch Portsmouth FC kit.  At Around the League, the kit-nerdiness of our managing editor has been long recognized – indeed, there was an unsubstantiated rumor circulating that Robert was preparing to trade for the giant inflatable Quakes jersey at Swap of the Table – one can only surmise the reason why, but ATL proposed one possibility:

Rumors of the acquisition were quickly nixed in the Jonas household – insufficient closet space – though a possible yard installation was briefly considered, perhaps serving as an annexe to house his extensive kit collection.

So, in honor of Earth Day this coming Sunday April 22, 2012, show your environmental awareness and consider how you might recycle your own soccer gear – Swap of the Table is an option for jerseys, or donate your gently used  equipment to charities such as Jean-Marc Alexandre’s for kids in Haiti.  If the fans ever discover the secret location of the (presumably) deflated jersey, I invite your imagination to speculate how the vaguely unsettling giant inflatable Amway jersey might be recycled into something of use for the San Jose soccer community.

New England Revolution player profile: Zak Boggs – unusually versatile, on and off the field

One of the brighter spots in the difficult 2011 New England Revolution season happened when Zak Boggs beat out the Quakes’ own Chris Wondolowski for the MLS W.O.R.K.S. Humanitarian of the Year award.  Unaccustomed to losing awards last season, chalk one up for Wondo, who scored the winning goal in this weekend’s 1-0 victory over the New England Revolution, opening the 2012 San Jose Earthquakes campaign.  Given that Zak was injured for this season’s opener and did not travel with the New England team, it might be considered a somewhat hollow victory if  you perceive a rivalry between the two players.

As a Quakes fan, I was disappointed for Wondo in 2011, but as a scientist in the biotechnology industry what particularly caught my attention was the reason for Zak Boggs’s victory as Humanitarian of the Year – he received the award for volunteering his time at the laboratory bench in a prestigious cancer research laboratory.  That’s not something you see every day, and I wanted to find out more.

Zak attended the University of South Florida on a soccer scholarship, where he played a crucial role in the Bulls’ first ever BIG EAST championship in 2008, finishing as the team’s second-leading scorer and earning All-Tournament Team honors. He was acquired by the Revolution in the second round (31st overall) of the 2010 MLS SuperDraft, and in 2011 made twenty regular-season appearances, including sixteen starts – eight as a forward, two in central midfield and six on the right wing.  Here are the first clues as to the versatility of this young man – he can fulfill several roles on the pitch, where he’s an energetic attacking combination midfielder and forward.

On and off the field Zak has gained a reputation for his steadfast work ethic, and the choice of a BS in Biomedical Science is by no means a soft academic option.  On behalf of Center Line Soccer, I recently had the opportunity to talk to Zak about his academic selections.  Early in our conversation Zak clearly articulated his love of science and personal drive to help patients.  His  decision to study biomedical science was was heavily influenced by his parents’ careers:  “My father is a surgeon, and my mom is a registered nurse practitioner… To be honest there was never anything else I wanted to study.”  His mom’s influence also introduced him to volunteering, which he continued under his own steam at the Moffitt Cancer Center while he was in graduate school at USF.

Yes, I said graduate school – it turns out that Zak is as diligent in the classroom as he is agile on the soccer field.  Zak graduated early from the University of Southern Florida  with a 4.0 average earning degree in biomedical sciences in May 2009.  He was nominated by USF for the highly-competitive and prestigious Rhodes, Marshall and Fulbright academic scholarships – a significant achievement in itself.  Not one to let his professional soccer career get in the way of graduate school, he continued, and successfully completed, his masters degree in marketing after he moved to Boston when he was selected by the Revolution.

Once Zak settled in Boston, he researched which local laboratories were working in his primary medical interest of angiogenesis (the process by which growing cancer tumors develop their own blood supply).  Serendipitously, the laboratory  in which Zak now works is in the same institution where the study of angiogenesis began – “I had wanted to get involved in the actual lab research, and so what better place to do it than Children’s Hospital Boston?”  Once or twice a week, rather than sit back and relax after hours of morning practice in Foxboro, Zak hops on the train into Boston to put in four hours of laboratory work.  Since 2010, he has been snapping on latex gloves, donning  a white coat and settling in for the afternoon at the research bench in the laboratory of Dr Marsha Moses, a professor at Harvard Medical School and the Director of the Vascular Biology Program at Children’s Hospital Boston.  Obviously, this is no academic backwater – this is a hard working, well-respected and extensively published research laboratory.

Zak’s journey to the Moses laboratory began with a prospective email and ended with an interview in which he took just five minutes to land the job. “She just wanted to know what my goal was out of this, and basically she said, ‘once I saw that you were and Eagle Scout, that was all I needed to know,’” he chuckled.  Many volunteers work with the patients at Children’s Hospital Boston, but Zak’s science background and passion to acquire laboratory experience surely contributed to him being hired into their research projects.

At the laboratory bench (which he keeps uncommonly tidy by the way) Zak works on sample preparation to measure diagnostic proteins in urine – and for biotech geeks that includes spectroscopy, zymography, and Western blots.  Just like soccer, medical research is a team effort – “Without a doubt it’s a team effort…[I’m] in the lab, but it goes beyond the lab…there are so many people that you don’t even see.”  All the while, handling samples from the littlest patients has led to a new perspective on his place in the scheme of things  - “I was doing some stuff for the brain cancer project last year, and you get a vial of spinal fluid and urine that comes with it, and you see how old these kids are, two and three years old having brain tumors,” he said seriously, “certainly [perspective] is one of the main things I get out of it.”

For the time being Zak remains the receiving end of the medical treatment process, impatiently waiting for his ankle to heal so he can return to the field.  He continues with the same laboratory endeavors that earned him the 2011 MLS Humanitarian of the Year award.  The unusual route by which he expresses his humanitarian side has also paid him back with a chance to retreat from Foxboro, meet people with a different outlook, and which he appears to find refreshing – “I’ve made some great friends there,” he enthused.

Whether or not Chris and Zak will duke it out for this year’s MLS humanitarian award remains to be seen – Chris Wondolowski will continue his support of Street Soccer USA – a non-profit organization that seeks to end homelessness through sports.  The unbalanced MLS schedule means that the next award might be the only other time that the pair will meet in competition this year.  Whatever happens, the humanitarian efforts of both players benefit so many people that while they might be considered rivals, in my eyes, neither player loses.

At the close of our conversation I asked Zak where he thought all of his academic and laboratory training would take him when his playing days are over.  He replied, “I don’t want to limit myself because I don’t know what’s going to happen, so I don’t want to lock into one certain thing, but I definitely want to be a doctor someday. It’s always been a goal of mine to do that – I don’t know in what capacity, or what kind of doctor, but I definitely want to go to medical school.”  With his academic achievements, hands on experience, and drive to succeed, undoubtedly it will be difficult for any medical school to turn him down.

Major League Soccer: The Road Trip Less Traveled

The first road trip of the San Jose Earthquakes 2012 season is upon us and Nerdy Gales highlights the obstacles for MLS fans and players alike that must be overcome with travel to away games - frequently  in distant states, sometimes in distant lands, and often with the symptoms of jet lag.

The first road trip of the 2012 San Jose Earthquakes season takes them across the border to the northern land of maple syrup, Mounties and metric cleats for their game in Toronto - their second comes close on its heels the following Saturday to Seattle to face the Sounders.  The former trip is a 2253 mile (or 3626 km if you set out from Toronto) round trip up north across three time zones and requires a passport to cross The International Boundary, an English-French dictionary, and enough Canadian dollars to buy chip butties at BMO Field.

Growing up in Britain, I had never fully grasped the vast expanse that is the USA .  Apparently, I was not alone amongst my compatriots - a friend called one afternoon when he had a six-hour layover in Cincinnati and wondered if I might like to help him pass the time by sinking a few beers.  Ordinarily I would be more than happy to oblige, but my apartment was in Baltimore - 510 miles and an eight hour drive way; no airport bar is worth that trip.  I guess the distance between the two cities looks much smaller in the map at the back of the  in-flight magazine, especially when you’ve grown up in England - a mere 50.3 thousand square miles (which would be 32nd largest state after Louisiana) compared to the USA at 3.8 million sq miles.

 

Compared with England, and using the Premier League as my frame of reference, the largest distance between two teams lies between St. James’ Park to Stamford Bridge - 287 miles driving distance from Newcastle United’s Alan Pardew to Chelsea’s latest victim  [insert manager-of-the-month's name].  In fact, within the season, Newcastle United is the most traveled EPL team, with an annual total of 3093 miles.  Transfer these distances to MLS, and The Magpies travel less distance in their entire season than the San Jose Earthquakes do in a round trip to nine of their eighteen rivals.  At the other end of the EPL spectrum, centrally located Stoke City travel a paltry 1597 miles in a season, which would get the Quakes as far as LIVESTRONG Sporting Park in Kansas City, but wouldn’t be far enough for them to find their way to BBVA Compass Stadium  in Houston.  If there's one benefit to the unbalanced 2012 schedule, it's the reduced burden of cross-US travel for fans and players of every team this season.

Clearly distances between teams are an order of magnitude larger in MLS than the EPL.  Just like Newcastle, San Jose lies on the periphery of its nation and the Earthquakes team has one of the largest total distances travelled throughout the season.  I was surprised to discover that the farthest distance between any two MLS teams is the 3163 miles the Quakes travel  when they visit the New England Revolution - that’s almost the same as from London, England to Portland, Maine.  Scanning the SportMapWorld.com MLS mileage chart, and making the assumption that five hours or approximately 350 miles to be the farthest distance a fan would consider driving, then only 40 of 342 (12%) possible match ups between the nineteen MLS teams fit my criteria - and three teams (Real Salt Lake, Sporting KC and the Colorado Rapids) have no drive-able rivals.  Supporters groups of the mid-Atlantic coast teams have most frequent access to away games with travel along I-95 between New York, Philadelphia, Washington and Boston.

At a certain point, the distances become large enough to warrant scouring the Internet for cheap flights to away games, and present two of the larger obstacles for the traveling MLS fan: expense and time (which, of course, is also money).   The road trips become expeditions, with a Quakes fan's journey from the east to west coast chewing up enough travel time and loss of time zones that it takes up an entire weekend, and maybe requiring a day off work for a Saturday game.  Despite these hurdles, there is evidence that in general road trips are becoming more common, and to the extent that the Independent Supporters Council (ISC) recently ratified a charter to create common standards for away fans in MLS.  The ISC has representatives from 16 of the 19 teams - including the Casbah of the Quakes - and aims to improve the experience for away travelers.

English football supporters' advocate Dave Boyle outlined the charter recently in The Guardian: “MLS has started to create standard practices and these can be improved further if the league communicates with supporter representatives from the ISC who can provide advice based on a wealth of shared travelling experience”.  He raised the interesting possibility that American supporters could have a larger influence over MLS than their EPL counterparts: with most MLS stadiums not filled to capacity the clubs have more incentive to fill seats, perhaps drawing on increasing numbers of away fans; such an incentive is missing in the EPL where matches are usually sold out.

So, after spending valuable time and money and coordinating your trip to the away stadium, perhaps with your supporters group, what can the travelling fans expect from the performance of their favorite players after going the distance across country?  Travelling from the west coast to the east coast is arduous, and Tweets from the players usually indicate who scored a window seat, and who got the chubby middle-seater – it’s obvious that these guys are not travelling in style; it’s economy all the way.

The huge travelling distances also present the phenomenon of circadian advantage – scientific research had previously shown the negative effect of coast to coast travel on the performance of baseball teams.  Teams with a three hour time-zone disadvantage to their home rival are likely to lose 60% of the time, compared to 50% of the time when they are equal.  The same research shows that for every time zone crossed, synchronization to that time zone requires one day.  Since the Quakes tend to leave northern California for their away games on Thursday afternoon for weekend games, the game scheduled for 1 PM Saturday afternoon (or 10 AM on the Californian biological clock) would mean they should only have been disadvantaged by one hour, which minimizes any advantage to Toronto FC to 51.7%.

Despite my concerns for the game's outcome being allayed by this level-playing-field statistic, it's well understood that disrupting circadian rhythms can cause such short-term effects as irritability, difficulty concentrating, fatigue, disorientation and gastrointestinal disturbances.  I know I can experience any four of these five symptoms just watching a close game - home or away.

 

UK map graphic courtesy of http://www.bootifulgame.com/.  

Preparedness 101: Zombie Quake Apocalypse

This week’s nearly-home game at AT&T Park might be dubbed “The Disaster Preparedness Derby” between the Earthquakes and the Zombie Quakes.  Earthquake preparedness is at the forefront of most California households’ minds, especially when your humble, if over-priced abode straddles the San Andreas or Hayward faults. Less frequently considered by San Francisco residents is the threat of a Zombie (Quakes or otherwise) Apocalypse - I know my own disaster kit in this instance consists of a single, slightly splintered cricket bat, based solely on what I’ve learned from watching Simon Pegg’s hilarious movie Shaun of the Dead.  Having a good solid piece of wood in your hand is quite often useful.

 Last year, maybe because of the movie, the Centers for Disease Control realized there was an egregious omission from their web site and designed a web page to prepare for such a Zombie attack.  Now illuminated on their pages are the symptoms of Ataxic Neurodegenerative Satiety Deficiency Syndrome, which is caused by an infectious agent after being passed on via bites and contact with bodily fluids. Obviously then, all we need to vanquish the Zombie Quakes on Saturday is bucket of bleach, a course of antibiotics as well as the aforementioned cricket bat.  In actuality, the page was set up with the serious intent to get people to make disaster preparedness kits, albeit with a let’s-also-prove-science-geeks-have-a-sense-of-humor approach. 

More danger is posed to the Quakes fans on Saturday by the threat of influenza, pneumonia or trench foot caused by the damp game-time conditions predicted in tonight’s weather forecast.  We all remember The Great Deluge of 2011: the coldest, windiest, wettest game in the four years that I’ve been going to games at Buck Shaw.  The game kicked off with the Earthquakes defending the shallow end, and the recently arrived Simon Dawkins showed good handling in the rain typical of his English homeland, and previously best exemplified by Darren Huckerby.

Despite the best efforts of some energetic Frisbee dogs to cheer up the fans at half time, and just after Kyle Beckerman broke the d(r)eadlock with a goal, I broke out the famous quote from Mel Brook’s Young Frankenstein:

Igor: Could be worse.

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: How?

Igor: Could be raining. [It starts to pour]

I wish I could say we all collapsed in laughter, but our spirits had just been dampened even further in the 2011 season opener against Real Salt Lake.  At the end of the game, we were cold and soaking wet - but at least we didn’t have to share our car home with a wet Frisbee dog, or a wet Kyle Beckerman.

So will this be Deluge II - the sequel?  If so, what will the title be? We can only hope that, true to cinematic precedents, this sequel won’t nearly be as hard-hitting as the original - and will be a damp squib of the ilk of The Sting II, Look Who’s Talking Too, or Dumb and Dumberer.   I don’t need (or want) another water-resistant, rust-proof high-tech alloy commemorative Great Deluge pin.  I'm not worried though - Quakes fans will be well-prepared - I have my Gore-Tex jacket and pants ready, Ziploc bags for my souvenirs, and waterproof boots (trench foot sucks; CDC has a page for that too).  I just wonder if there’s enough room for my cricket bat - just in case. 

Draft Picks For The New Season: We're Spoiled For Choice.

Going into the preseason I was wondering which pairings were likely to be the most successful for the Earthquakes offense in 2012 – Salinas to Wondo, Chavez to Lenhart, or Dawkins to Güvenışık.  I got part way to my answer in the final preseason game in the Portland tournament against Chivas USA - the team produced five goals from five different players.  A donut fuelled cross from Shea Salinas, was neatly converted to Chris Wondolowski for the first goal in the 27^th minute.  In the second half, Ramiro Corrales redirected a corner kick onto the head of Justin Morrow for the second goal.  Ramiro, for his second assist, picked out Tressor Moreno for the 80^th minute third goal, and just four minutes later, Moreno forwarded the favor giving Sercan Güvenışık his first goal as an Earthquake.  Another inaugural goal, this time for rookie Sam Garza was then passed forward by Sercan Güvenışık to close out the game with the fifth and final goal of the afternoon.

While each of these goals was a pleasure to see, I got much more satisfaction from the breadth of effort across the team – goal scorers were also logging assist statistics and vice versa – and the well-stocked midfield of the current roster certainly paid off that day.  My only remaining question going into the season is the shallower depth in the defence - especially with preseason injuries to Hernandez and Bernardez, and the prospect of Opara being called away on under-23 duty qualifying for (and hopefully playing in) the 2012 Olympic finals in London.

Meanwhile, off the field, new acquisitions will also enhance the game experience for the rested and ready Quakes fans.  On paper, the depth of menu items from the gourmet food trucks in the Epicenter has vastly expanded over last season – and not unlike the Earthquakes roster, there are some experienced veterans and new arrivals to tempt our taste buds.  I wonder which gastronomic pairings are likely to be the most successful for the fans as we navigate through the new food and adult beverage choices at Buck Shaw this season.

• Boddingtons Pub Ale – known as Boddingtons Draught Bitter in its British homeland (wistful sigh), is a bitter beer with a smooth, creamy head reminiscent of that on Guinness; it'll give you a beer mustache - "got Boddys?".  Boddingtons recommends pairing this beer with “spicy, charred and aromatic dishes”, so paired with the spicy tacos at El Tonayense, it provides an alternative, if more avant garde pairing than the usual Corona.
• Sierra Nevada Pale Ale – the flagship of the brewery – is defined as a delightful interpretation of a classic amber style, and is a full-bodied, complex ale.  Heavily hopped, its fragrant bouquet and spicy flavor, pairs particularly well with seafood – an ideal accompaniment to the fish and chips of Sam’s Chowdermobile.
• Stella Artois – given the 9 step (count ‘em) ‘pouring ritual’ for the draught version of this light, crisp and refreshing Belgian pilsner, it’s perhaps as well that we can buy the instant gratification of  the bottles supplied at The Buck.  Feel free to let out your inner-Brando, and yell “Steelllaaaaa” at the Gourmet Truck Named Desire – for me that’s Chairman Bao, with its richly filled fragrant pork buns.
• Gordon Biersch Hefeweizen - is a true, unfiltered, Bavarian-style wheat (Weizen) beer with the yeast (Hefe) still present.  According to the GB web site, this beer is traditionally consumed Sunday morning in Bavaria after church (and sometimes before as well as during) alongside Weisswurst (white veal sausages) and freshly baked Brez'n (pretzels). Why wait until Sunday? Get an early start this Saturday night with a Polish Dog and pretzels for the Buck Shaw concessions stand.

Of course, these are my own current best pairings – myriad combinations are possible, some of which I haven’t even considered yet – let me know your own;  we've got the whole season to figure it out.  See you all on March 10th for the first kick of the season - I believe Frank Yallop and I are both looking forward to a better depth of choice and fewer injuries.

Player Numbers: Does 2 x 10 - a better 11?

Geoff Lepper recently wrote that the Quakes have finally found their ‘first legitimate number ten’ with their new signing Colombian Tressor Moreno – let’s welcome Tressor. The San Jose Earthquakes spent their off season searching for a midfield replacement in the event that Simon Dawkins wouldn’t return to the squad in 2012. In actual fact, Dawkins, is returning to the Quakes, so if he keeps his jersey number (ten), there may be a conundrum when the Quakes will venture forth an ‘actual’ number ten and a ‘classic’ number ten (who’s actually wearing #27).

In the article, Frank Yallop was quoted as saying “Simon Dawkins is a good soccer player, but more of a forward. This guy [Moreno] looks to pass the ball. … It’s the first time we’ve got [a player] who looks to do what number tens do”. His quote prompted a fellow season ticket holder to ask me about the origin of the phrase “classic number ten”. I knew, roughly, that it referred to a midfielder, probably of the attacking variety, but that was based on a distant (and therefore fuzzy) memory of old-fashioned shirt numbers. I grew up watching teams play with the original jersey numbering of one through eleven on the backs of  whichever players trotted out for each game; the goal keeper was number one, and the remaining numbers were designated from the back line, through the midfield to the forwards. Logically then, number ten would belong to someone who was positioned up near the front – that meager knowledge was all I could offer in response.

Obviously, it was time for me to settle down at my laptop with a mug of coffee and hit the Google-verse to fill in my memory gaps (aside: when will there be an MLS Google doodle?). It turns out that the original one through eleven number designation arose from English association football as far back as 1923. Back then, the standard formation from back to front was 2-3-5; I could warm to that offensively-minded formation. Although 2-3-5 seems staggeringly unbalanced, it was conservative compared to England’s 1-1-8 lineup in their first official game against Scotland who employed a more offensively parsimonious 1-2-7. Ironically, perhaps inevitably, that game finished 0-0 – but I digress. In the original 2-3-5 formation there was a squad full of esoteric positions: ‘backs’ and ‘inside’ and ‘outside’ forwards (what I used to call a ‘winger’), with each position numbered as follows: 1 – Goalkeeper, 2 – Right full back, 3 – Left full back, 4 – Right half back, 5 – Center half back, 6 – Left half back, 7 – Outside right, 8 – Inside right, 9 – Center forward, 10 – Inside left, 11 – Outside left.

Gradually, with the evolution of twentieth century soccer, new formations were intelligently designed from the 2-3-5 that involved moving specific positions to different areas of the field. As the formations changed and the players lined up in their new positions, their jersey numbers went with them. For example, the half back was pushed back to become a defender, and so central defenders wearing number five were remnants of the original 2-3-5 system. Historically, when the England national squad played the 4-4-2 formation, they typically lined up four defenders – #2, #5, #6, #3; four midfielders – #7, #4, #10, #11; two forwards – #8, #9. Comparing the two formations in the diagram below, you can see that the half backs, wingers (and the #10) were pulled back from the 2-3-5 to create the 4-4-2. Those attack-minded 19th century English and Scottish forwards would have been shocked and confused – perhaps even a little lonely.

There are myriad other formations some of which are evocatively named: The Danubian Formation (a modified 2-3-5 popular in central Europe in the 1930s), the Christmas Tree formation (4-3-2-1; with its obvious shape), and the Magic Rectangle (4-2-2-2; used, to no avail, by Brazil in the 1998 World Cup final, and which has since been termed ‘suicidal’). The continued designation of  a player’s starting position by his jersey number appears to have gradually become redundant (or perhaps too difficult) with the increasingly esoteric soccer formations. Starting with the 1954 World Cup, each player in a country’s 22-man squad wore a specific number for the duration of the tournament. Despite the early success of the approach at the international level, fixed squad numbers didn’t become standard in the FA Premier League until the 1993-94 season, and in the rest of Europe shortly thereafter. While the US Men’s National Team is still subject to this mandated squad numbering system in official tournament play, the new head coach, Jurgen Klinsmann has reverted to the original one through eleven numbering system in friendly games. His reasoning is that identifying each position by its number will inspire competition for starting places on the international squad.  What goes around comes around.

Getting back to that classic number ten – an attacking midfielder sometimes called a trequartista (Italian for three-quarters, denoting his field position), enganche (Spanish for “to hook’; intriguingly also a term used in tango dancing) , or playmaker. His role is to play just behind the forwards, or ‘in the hole’, and create goal scoring opportunities for his team’s strikers, or even himself. The playmaker came into his own with the popularity of 4-4-2, which peaked in the 1990s and early 2000s. All four semi-finalists in Euro 2000 played ‘classic’ number tens in the hole between the opposition defense and midfield: Zidane (France), Totti (Italy), Costa (Portugal) and Bergkamp (Holland); England and Germany did not and they perished early in the tournament. Lately however, the folks at Zonal Marking effectively argue that as the 4-4-2 becomes outdated in Europe, the days of the classic ten are numbered: “Lionel Messi started as a classic Argentine number ten in a central play making position, then became established as a wide forward, now occasionally plays up top.” Furthermore, they argue, as most players arerequired to become more versatile (playing as strikers, wingers or in the hole), their current role has become more difficult to define; perhaps eventually top players won’t even have favoured positions.

Fortunately for Quakes fans, Simon Dawkins will be playing soccer once again in the blue and black, and the 4-4-2 has not (yet) fallen out of favor. So, if Moreno is the ‘classic’ number ten, and Dawksy stays at the ‘actual’ number ten, I’m concerned about the ramifications for the space-time continuum within the 4-4-2. Will Frank Yallop need to roll out a novel formation to prevent the imminent collapse of the universe? How many (perhaps  all) of the players be out of position if he tries out an old-school, Scottish 1-2-7 (the “Graeme Souness Perm” or “Lenhart” formation – lots going on up top)? As my friend Nigel points out: Most teams only play one number ten, but where can you go from there? When you need that extra push to the playoffs, where is there to go? It looks like the Quakes have gone one better, and their best eleven might have two tens.

Build It Now

I am in favor of the planned stadium development permit.  

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In my mirthquakes blog it’s been all to easy to make light of the plight of the Quakes fans over the past four years– but I felt the need to stay cheerful, even when the seat numbers on the aluminum bleachers are eighteen inches apart and the width of my hips (on a good day) is nineteen inches.  

The upside of that scenario is that I’ve made close friends with the people around me in Section 103.  When I look around the bleachers there’s a diversity of gender, ethnicity, and professions.  It’s a big, often rambunctious family comprising parents, siblings and eccentric great-aunts, with diverse personalities: vocal and energetic; cynical and phlegmatic, analytical and judgmental.  Our common ground is down below on the pitch and the San Jose Earthquakes players on its cool, grass surface - we are all united in our support of them.  

The players on our team are equally diverse - scan the roster and you will see local heroes, Europeans, Central and South Americans, even a Texan with a Thai surname.  Their personalities range from quiet leaders, to crazy goalkeepers and vocal players who black out when they argue their team mate’s case with the officials.  There are young rookies with meagre salaries working hard to get their chance and veterans working just as hard to keep their slot.  All are engaged in the action on the field, and off the field they engage frequently within the community and the fans in front of whom they play each week.  

As we cross the rail road tracks to our new stadium, we’ll need to get along with our new neighbors.  The reason for Wednesday’s planning meeting is to revisit the concerns they have raised, and I hope the changes to the stadium design and the proposal as a whole, will address those concerns to their satisfaction.  For my own part, as a fan, I cannot promise that I won’t noisily vocalize my support inside the stadium while the game is in progress – in fact I hope there will be many opportunities for us all to celebrate.  Outside of the stadium, as a fellow citizen, I will promise to be cognizant of my surrounding neighbors, my potential impact on their lives and respect their interests and concerns.  

There are many players who make the San Jose Earthquakes work as an organization – not just the guys who kick and dribble the ball.  It’s a conglomeration of fans, players, coaches, trainers, front office, stadium staff, grounds keepers, vendors, and media.  All are valued members of this diverse Earthquakes family - a family that truly reflects the community it serves.  


After four years of patience doesn’t this family deserve their own home?

Top Ten Bad Ideas for 2012 Earthquakes Shirt Sponsors

Milan, fashion capital of the world, is home to Armani, Versace and Dolce and Gabana.  Indeed, the city’s passion for fashion and soccer made for the perfect marriage when D&G created a glossy book of portraits of impeccably tailored AC Milan players in 2011.  I wonder if D&G would have been as quick to publish back in 1981, when the word ‘Pooh’ was emblazoned across the chest of each player’s kit.  Pooh - a jeans company with a name so odious that the club didn’t win a major trophy until they switched to the more mundanely named car manufacturer ‘Opel’ in the 1990s.

It strikes me that while the Quakes front office appreciated the financial input of the Amway global shirt sponsorship, the fans had a much tougher time embracing the corporate culture of what can euphemistically be called the ‘multi-level marketing’ of household products.  Amway written on the our chests might just as well have been ‘Pooh’ - as fans we were fed up of being picked on by friends at home, and by rival supporters on away trips.

My own experience came in The Pike brew pub, where after a rousing away victory for the Quakes, Seattle-ite patrons pointed, snickered and asked us what household cleaners or Nutrilite supplements we would be trying to sell them directly.  We remained good-natured guests, but we rolled our eyes and glanced sheepishly at each other; I usually have a snappy comeback, but on that occasion I quietly admitted that “I got nuthin’”.

The three year Amway sponsorship deal has not been renewed, and CLS’s own Lisa Erickson has already proposed possible solutions to resolve the revenue-free status of the bare-chested shirts of the 2012 San Jose Earthquakes.  In the meantime, fans can now spend their hard earned cash on sponsor-free jerseys: Quakes in black, Quakes in blue or Quakes in white; maybe all three.  A new sponsor will eventually be found, and optimistic fans believe that the next shirt sponsor will be a more acceptable one than Amway, one that we will be less reticent to defend.

But what if it’s not?  What if the next shirt sponsor makes us pine for the good old days of household cleaners, energy bars and health supplements?  What if the new sponsor provides an even less palatable alternative?  Hoping to nix any unsuitable contracts before they get signed, here’s my top ten list of undesirable shirt sponsors to be avoided:

1. Preparation H: let’s get straight to the bottom of the issue - we’re all a little sore after sitting on aluminum bleachers for four straight years.  Cold, hard and unforgiving - and that’s just the fans.  It’s just been a pain in The Buck; Preparation H would be a relevant sponsor, but it would still feel like having Pooh on your shirt.
2. Viagra: Quakes sponsored by the little blue pill?  The 1906 Ultras won’t need the specially formulated blue and black pill to ensure they are up for 90 minutes, but they should be aware that any longer than four hours might be dangerous; physicians would have to be consulted.
3. Vuvuzela:  Currently banned at Buck Shaw, this sponsorship would have to reinstate the distracting trumpets and the promotion would surely only work with co-sponsors: “brought to you by Tylenol” or accompanied by a set of Etymotic noise-canceling ear phones.
4. Caltrain: The fans can’t have horns, but trains do, and apparently train horns are not as loud (or as frequent) as a new soccer stadium.   So, perhaps instead of vuvuzelas, fans would receive free rides to the game and a complimentary train horn for the Caltrain Night promotion (same caveats as #3).
5. Pamplona Tourist Board: Here’s an obvious running of the bulls tie in for a home game against New York, but the unbalanced schedule means the Red Bulls won’t be rolling into town this season.  The Ultras are spirited enough to participate in a run down El Camino Real, though they would insist on wearing blue scarves instead of red neckerchiefs. OSHA regulations would permit the Ultras to participate with the obligatory paperwork, but the SPCA considers that running with the Ultras might be dangerous for the bulls.
6. Occupy: I’m considering here what the club might do with that vaguely unsettling giant, inflatable Amway shirt by the George Best gate.  Perhaps it can be re-purposed into a new home for an ‘Occupy Buck Shaw’ protest movement (slogan: Build It Now!).  However, it’s only a matter of time before an irate fan runs out from within the new structure during the California Clasico to handcuff themselves to David Beckham.
7. Friskies:  Plenty of perks for the pet loving fans here: free pet food, Eleanor Abernathy action figures, litter and scratch-poles in the Epicenter.  Unfortunately, these items might attract feral cats across the railroad track into the stadium; the hairballs would cause nightmares in the little kids.
8. Twinkies: a pastry so unhealthy, so objectionable that their manufacturer is going bankrupt.  Hostess would roll out a Twinkie food truck (The TwinKart; El(evated) Triglyceridense; TwinkiBites), which might be problematic since uneaten Twinkies also come with rigorous EPA regulations for their disposal - the filling is a known bio-hazardous material.
9. Lenscrafters:  The conveniently placed eye-chart on the front of the shirt could all too easily be abused by players, as they argue their case with the referees; I don’t see it myself.
10. Forever Lazy: At first glance, a great idea for the chilly evenings early in the season, but who wants to see the subs sitting on the side line bench in blue fleece onesies with butt flaps?

Honorable Mentions: ‘Onest ‘Arry Redknapp Tax Advisors; Justin Bieber; Nigerian Prince Financial Services, Upstream Tricasters, Zune.  

In the absence of a sponsor, the Colorado Rapids are rewarding their 2012 season ticket holders with their own signature on this season’s shirt.  Maybe the Earthquakes could sign up Sharpie so we can all sign one another’s new empty shirts with their cool silver-inked pens?   You’ll need to buy your unadorned 2012 San Jose Earthquakes shirts now, but if you feel the need to emblazon the blank canvas on your chest with an advertisement, use your own best judgement, and please avoid the sponsors listed above.

Who will you be wearing this year?




This blog was first published on Center Line Soccer on February 9, 2012.

Yet Another Offside Controversy.

The offside rule: the gift that keeps on giving on the field of soccer controversy.  The two words ‘offside’ and ‘controversy’ are often found side by side, just as often as Robert Jonas and El Tonayense taco truck.  Nothing, but nothing, provokes an emotional response deep inside the soul of a soccer fan quite like a good, solid controversial offside call - especially when it’s called at just the right (or wrong) moment of a game.

Controversial offside calls are universal and have been whistled from rec league quagmires to the lush fields of the World Cup; every team in the history of soccer has been on the receiving end of an egregious call.  Officials, driven to distraction by vuvuzelas perhaps in the 2010 World Cup, allowed Carlos Tevez's first goal for Argentina against Mexico, despite being miles offside.  Quakes fans cheered when arch rivals LA Galaxy were denied a goal in the 2011 MLS Cup Final - I’m sure you have your own favorite example.

For the casual fan the offside rule is often misunderstood, and on more than one occasion I have found my British accent a cue for intense cross-examination by soccer moms and dads – the concept of scoring goals is obvious, but they believe it takes years of soccer watching to firmly grasp the offside rule. The official definition of offside is succinctly described by FIFA, with the offside position defined in eighty-one words and the offence in an additional fifty-seven words.  However, the offside rule is hard to explain convincingly, and so it’s often perceived as the benchmark of soccer knowledge (akin to the infield fly rule in baseball).

Both John Cleese and The Guardian demonstrated that the average man on the street finds it surprisingly difficult to explain the offside rule, and appears dazed and confused without some kind of illustrative gadget.  In England, the concept is  easily explained in the greasy spoon over cup of tea and a chip butty using salt & pepper pots with the ketchup representing the goalie, or at the pub with empty glasses and beer mats. 

Now, British fans have a new tool at their disposal – a recently designed fifty pence (about seventy-five cents) coin, minted to celebrate the sports of the 2012 Olympics in Great Britain.  The seven sided coin has captured the greatest talking point in soccer with an illustration depicting offside on the reverse.  The illustration was designed by Neil Wolfson, who used a stunningly simple representation of a midfielder (apparently Triangle FC) about to pass to one of two team-mates: one player is marked as offside, and the second, level with the defender (from Irish club  Square United) is  not offside.

Courtesy the Royal Mint, UK.

Ironically, the coin’s design itself has caused its own controversy – referees wrapped in wet blankets exploited immutable laws of physics and wielded the negative energy of controversy claiming that the designof the coin was incorrect.  They put forward the argument that the diagram illustrates the offside law as it was until 1995, which has since been superseded by a revision that means any player in an offside position when the ball is played is no longer automatically penalised – whatever. 

Designer Wolfson, a sports journalist, cheerfully countered the referees’ argument that the design was meant to demonstrate the offside position – not the offside offense.  "The coin simply states that the player is 'offside' – which is true, irrespective of whether or not an 'offside offence' results...so I simply don't agree with [referee] Mal Davies’s objection on the basis that he refers to the 'offside offence', despite the coin having no such reference.  I just hope Mal doesn't book me for showing dissent." 

I guess we shouldn’t be surprised that referees would focus on the offence rather than the position, it’s just one more occasion that they’ve been witnessed controlling the puppet strings of controversy. Of course, on the other side of the coin,  it’s this very controversy that animates the fans and, to many a publicans’ delight, fuels the heated and lengthy discussions in the pub after the game.  Restaurant profit margins are preserved as table condiments are no longer spilled in lengthy reenactments – the new fifty-pence coin can be safely stowed in your back pocket as a compact visual aid to define the offside position should the need arise.

So, what about that other controversy currently on the minds of San Jose fans: Quakes in blue, or Quakes in black?  Perhaps we should just flip a coin. 

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Originally posted 01/30/2012 at Centerlinesoccer.com

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P.S. 02/02/2012

In response to a question posted on CLS I had fun designing my own coin to explain the infield fly rule.
  

Proposed design for the silver dollar depicting the infield fly rule